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I deleted all my dating apps six months ago, and here’s how my life has changed

I deleted all my dating apps six months ago, and here’s how my life has changed

Six months ago, I made the decision to delete my dating apps, which I had been using on and off for a atic or terrible had happened. In fact, Patrick, the man from Hinge whom I’d been dating just before deleting the app, was kind, intelligent, and in many ways what I’d look for in a partner. In fact, it was for him that I deleted Hinge and Bumble, my then-dating apps of choice, at the beginning of the year. Because I’d lost the appetite for ‘chatting to’ multiple people at once – who even has the time? – and I figured I could always download the apps again if we were to break up.

But after a couple of months (and one honest-but-disappointing conversation), it became clear that we just weren’t in mutually-compatible situations to continue dating. As so often happens with early romances, we fizzled out, rather than imploded. But there was a poignance to that, too; the time I’d invested getting to know someone I’d never see again. The shared memories that no longer had a home. The secret hopes I’d had about our immediate future as a couple: planning trips away, spending Sundays together, sitting at opposite ends of the sofa or lying in bed reading our respective books in comfortable silence (am I alone in having this as a romantic fantasy?).

When we stopped seeing one another, I felt, immediately, the familiar urge to download the apps again – like I had done time and time again, on and off, for the past . But I resisted it – and instead I chose to process the disappointment I was feeling in losing the thing-that-could-have-been-a-thing.